Thursday, August 04, 2005

Yes, No, or Wait

Why can't it always be a yes? I wonder why.

At the back of my mind, I know there's no reason to wonder at all, actually. I'm well aware that yes, an approving nod does not necessarily mean that everything will go along just fine. That granting every wish does not always guarantee contentment and happiness. That not all gifts are beneficial (lesson: Bruce Almighty). That not every aid can help. A YES, in a way, could be a NO.

Rejection, on the other hand, does not always mean flat-out defeat. That being a cull equates to no futility. That being bereft of something (or someone) you so wishfully desire does not always produce a domino effect – of one rejection after another. It may chip off a bit of one's ego and dignity, but it doesn't make him less of a human being. The pain could be excruciating, but it will eventually go away, or even forgotten. After the rain, it's that hopeful rainbow's turn to exhibit its bright colors, so goes the melodramatic saying. A NO could probably be a YES.

To await for something (or someone) presents this uncertainty that is in fact, a test of faith. It could be stressful. It could either leave one dubious of what's to come, or being sure of what he hopes for as he hangs around in agitation. This state could also be a pruning time, a happenstance, an opportunity to reflect on one's state of heart. But waiting entails a huge amount of patience.

I sometimes prefer to wait than to be denied of something (or someone, I had to insert this for consistency in emphasis) point-blank. I would never decline a blessing, of course, especially when it's what I've been yearning for – I mean, who would? Unless inevitable. But I have learned a great deal in waiting. There's pain along the way but it's all worth my while.

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